Being an adult.

I just recently came to the realization that there are things in life that it's okay for me to enjoy being where I am in life. I've got 3 children, 5 and under. My days are full of screaming, crying, playing, laughing, hearing "Mommy" a 1,000 times, trying to clean, running errands, going to the park, changing diapers, feeding children...you get the idea... Any parent knows that the more children you have the more lax you are with each one that comes along. Our first child didn't have sugar until she turned 1 year. Now the 3rd, we still monitor it, but I've given her nibbles of cake. I didn't spend a day away from my first child until she was 16 months old and I was in the hospital having her little brother. Now with the 3rd, I'm yearning to go out and have some me time. I love my children more than life and I entirely enjoy being a SAHM, but sometimes, I yearn for adult conversation. My youngest child is now 9 months old, and I've decided that pumping and dumping once in a while is okay. I still don't consume caffeine...so I'm not changing completely...but up until this point (and with my other 2) I refused to have a drink. Funny how things change. I just feel like I've grown as a person and decided that it's okay to be an adult. It's okay to have time to yourself once in a while. It's okay to spend time with your husband alone and be romantic. It's okay to have a drink. I'm not a bad mother for having those thoughts. I'm not being selfish by trying to find myself as a person. It's such a relief to be able to release those thoughts and free myself in a way.